Inner Journey of a Coach
January 24, 2025Associate Partner, Tutul Consulting
Krishnan Vaidyanathan
Embarking on the inner journey of a coach requires deep, disciplined work on both the body and the mind. As we quiet the distractions of both, we connect with something fundamental and universal within us.
There are countless articles about the skills required to be a good coach—active listening, asking meaningful questions, aligning goals, holding accountability, and more. However, for these skills to be truly effective and sustained, a coach must embark on an inner journey of transformation. This journey involves deep, personal shifts that enable these complex skills to manifest effortlessly.
Here are two essential aspects every coach must cultivate within their mindset:
Drop the judgements
As coaches, our primary role is to offer a safe, non-judgmental space and work with individuals on their path to transformation. To truly understand a client’s experiences and thoughts, we must listen with intent—not to respond, but to understand. This requires letting go of judgments.
Judgments often stem from a sense of right and wrong. But what defines right and wrong? While some are guided by moral or dharmic principles, many judgments arise from raga (likes) and dvesha (dislikes)—our personal preferences and aversions. These biases are shaped by our expectations, often masked as justifications: “This is justified,” or “This is the right thing to do.”
A powerful example comes from the Devi Mahatmyam, where the characters Chanda and Munda encounter the radiant Devi. Overwhelmed by her brilliance, they report to Shumbha, suggesting that he—being all-powerful and wealthy—must possess this “jewel among women.” This narrative highlights how raga and dvesha build ego and divert the mind toward worldly attachments. In this story, these asuric tendencies are the first to be destroyed to enable spiritual growth.
For a coach, this inner journey of going beyond the personal likes and dislikes is vital. It is the foundation for creating a space free of judgment—a space where transformation can truly occur.
2. Be compassionate
Compassion is at the heart of effective coaching. It goes beyond empathy, allowing the coach to connect deeply with the client’s journey. Compassion fosters a sense of oneness with the client’s context, enabling the coach to become a true partner in their process of change.
Operating from a place of love and compassion enables coaches to walk alongside their clients as co-travelers on their journey. This connection is not just supportive—it is transformative.
Sankaracharya in his Vivekachudamani (verse 41) beautifully illustrates this idea. In the text, a disciple approaches the Guru, burdened by the afflictions of the world. The Guru, filled with compassion, responds in a way that eases the disciple’s fears:
तथा वदन्तं शरणागतं स्वं
संसारदावानलतापतप्तम् ।
निरीक्ष्य कारुण्यरसार्द्रदृष्ट्या
दद्यादभीतिं सहसा महात्मा ॥ ४१ ॥
(As he thus speaks, tormented by the afflictions of the world – which is like a forest on fire – and seeking his protection, the saint eyes him with a glance softened with pity and spontaneously bids him give up all fear).
Compassion like this allows a coach to hold space for a client’s fears, challenges, and transformation with patience and love.
The Journey Within
Embarking on the inner journey of a coach requires deep, disciplined work on both the body and the mind. As we quiet the distractions of both, we connect with something fundamental and universal within us. This connection strengthens our ability to coach with clarity and purpose, empowering us to work with individuals across any domain or challenge.
The process of becoming a coach is as much about transforming ourselves as it is about supporting others. It is this personal evolution that forms the foundation for powerful, impactful coaching.
Wishing you success on this transformative path!